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Iver Marjerison
Iver@Microweddings.org
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Can my friend officiate my wedding in the USA?

Yes, your friend can officiate your wedding! The aspect of “officiating” the wedding has two components: legal and symbolic. Symbolically there are no rules, do whatever you want! Legally, it depends on the state and country (some are more difficult than others), but in all USA states if your friend does the correct paperwork they will be able to sign legally fill the role as well.

How do you ask a friend to be your wedding officiant?

Just ask! When approaching your friends, emphasize why you want them to play this important role on your special day. Be sincere and heartfelt in your request, and share your reasons for wanting them to be part of the ceremony. It also helps to assure them that they are the right person for the job, and that you’ll help guide them on what you have in mind for the day (so they don’t get to nervous upfront).

How can my friend become ordained to officiate my wedding?

The process for your friend to become ordained to officiate your wedding is fairly simple. Your friend can become ordained through various online ministries or religious organizations that offer ordination services. Some popular options include the Universal Life Church (ULC) and American Marriage Ministries (AMM). The ordination process typically involves filling out an application and paying a nominal fee.

After being ordained, your friend must research and confirm the legal requirements in your specific location. In most cases, ordinations from recognized organizations are legally valid, but local regulations may vary. Many states in the USA require you to register with with the County Clerk as an officiant.

Is my friend's ordination legally recognized?

The legality of your friend's ordination depends on local laws and regulations. While many places recognize ordinations from established organizations, verifying the validity of your officiant friend’s credentials with your local marriage authorities is crucial. In most cases your friend’s “ordination” itself is not in question, but their status with the state may be. Again, many USA states require wedding officiants to register directly with them PRIOR to the wedding.

How does my friend fill out the marriage license?

In many instances, the officiant (whether a friend or professional) is responsible for completing and filing the marriage license and certificate after the ceremony. They must ensure that all required information is accurate and the document is submitted to the appropriate authorities in time. Your officiant friend should also be aware of the requirements of the specific local laws, such as,

• The presence of witnesses

• How the couple should sign the license (does the bride use her new name?)

• Restrictions regarding recording the ceremony, some states require a specific exchange of words (aka the declaration of intent).

Can my friend officiate a wedding if they are not ordained?

In most cases, your friend won't be able to legally “officiate” your wedding if they're not legally ordained. However, they can symbolically lead the ceremony and do all the other aspects! And you can simply handle the legal stuff at another time.

What responsibilities does the officiant have during the wedding ceremony?

Officiating a wedding ceremony is a big responsibility that should not be taken lightly. The primary responsibilities of a wedding officiant are:

• Writing the wedding script.

• Leading the ceremony.

• Conducting vows and ring exchanges.

• Signing the marriage license.

• Setting the tone for the rest of the wedding!

Do we need to obtain a marriage license if a friend officiates the wedding?

Yes, if you want to be legally married, you will still need to obtain a marriage license from your local government office, regardless of who officiates the ceremony. It isn't the wedding ceremony that legalizes a marriage but the actual marriage license. If you want to just have a symbolic ceremony, you don’t need the license.

Can we customize the ceremony if a friend is officiating?

Certainly! Having a friend officiate your wedding allows for maximum personalization. You can customize the ceremony with readings, vows, rituals, and traditions that are meaningful to you and your future spouse, making it a truly unique and memorable experience.

Do we need a backup plan if our friend can't officiate on the wedding day?

It's always a good idea to have a backup plan in case your friend can't officiate due to unforeseen circumstances. Consider asking your friend for a digital copy of their script and an ordained officiant friend on standby to ensure your wedding ceremony proceeds as planned.

Are there any restrictions on what my friend can say during the ceremony?

In some cases the officiant may be legally required to perform a declaration of intent (aka the “I Dos”), otherwise, there aren't any legal restrictions on what your friend can say when officiating your wedding ceremony. But, your friend should generally remember to keep the ceremony appropriate. This means not taking any jabs at religious, cultural, and community traditions and not saying hurtful comments about anyone involved in the wedding… and DON’T mention any X’s in any context! (this happens quite often).

Should I provide guidelines for the ceremony to my friend's officiant?

Absolutely! Provide guidelines for your friend to create a ceremony that reflects your personality and preferences. This takes a load off your friend's shoulders while ensuring you maintain your unique vision of your wedding. Discuss your expectations, any specific elements you want to include, and the overall flow of the ceremony well in advance with them.

If you have doubts or questions regarding the officiating process, simply refer to our e-guide on “How To Officiate A Wedding”. This comprehensive guide has been compiled with advice and tips gained after coordinating over 500 weddings as a wedding officiant and planner.

Can we have multiple officiants, including a friend?

Yes, you can have multiple officiants for your wedding ceremony, including a friend. Some couples choose to have both a friend and a religious or professional officiant to represent different aspects of their beliefs or relationships. But ensure that all officiants coordinate their roles during the ceremony to maintain a smooth flow.

What should our friend wear when officiating our wedding?

Your officiant friend should dress in a relatively neutral way, and align with the formality, color scheme, and theme of the wedding. Many friend officiants opt for a suit, dress, or outfit that complements the wedding party's attire. Discussing attire expectations with your friend officiant in advance is a good idea to ensure they feel comfortable and well-dressed for the occasion.

How long should the ceremony be if a friend is officiating?

Most wedding ceremonies, whether conducted by a friend or a professional, typically last between 20 to 30 minutes. But, of course, you can adjust this time according to your wedding preferences. Work with your officiant friend to create a timeline that suits your vision and the elements you want to include in the wedding ceremony.

How should we thank our friend for officiating our wedding?

It is essential to show gratitude to the friend who took on the honor and responsibility of officiating your wedding. My recommendation is to gift your friend officiant with a leather padfolio, this gives them something elegant to use to hold their script during the ceremony, and can be a nice keepsake. Alternatively, a hyperbolic “Wedding Officiant” license or parking pass can be a funny gag gift!

No Legal Advice Intended

While anyone can choose to lead a wedding ceremony symbolically, each state has its own requirements as to who can sign the license, and make it legal (aka "solemnize") the wedding. The general information that I provide only pertains to the USA. I cannot guarantee that you will be able to solemnize any marriage. The information that I provide you with is NOT legal advice.

The information that Microweddings LLC has provided, and will provide, is intended to convey general information only and not to provide legal advice or opinions. This information may not reflect the most current legal developments. No action should be taken in reliance on this information. Microweddings LLC disclaims all liability in respect to actions taken or not taken based on any or all of the contents of this information to the fullest extent permitted by law.  An attorney should be contacted for advice on specific legal issues.